Field Guide to Being an Awesome Birth Partner

This is the fourth in a series of posts about things a birth partner should plan ahead for.

1. Plan Ahead – The Drive
2. Plan Ahead – Birth Plan
3. Plan Ahead – Setting up at Home
4. Plan Ahead – Take Birthing Classes
5. Plan Ahead – Packing
6. Plan Ahead – Know Her Situation
7. Plan Ahead – Be Ready to Comfort
8. Plan Ahead – Series Wrap-Up

The term “birthing classes” probably brings to mind a scene from a TV show or movie.  Rows of women with round bellies are wearing sweats, sitting on yoga mats, leaning against their husbands who look like they’d rather be anywhere else.  The instructor at the front of the room is explaining something that you can’t quite hear over the synchronized “hchee hchee hchoooo, hchee hchee hchoooo” breathing.

How the heck is that going to help anyone with anything?

Well, here’s the deal.  And a spoiler warning first:  (spoiler) TV and movies aren’t entirely accurate (end spoiler).  Birthing classes have become more useful over the years.  TV just hasn’t caught up.

These days, most hospitals offer some sort of birthing classes for expectant mothers and their birth partners.  Some hospitals offer a deluxe menu of class options.  Just figuring out which classes to take could be difficult.  So here are my recommendations for the minimum classes to take, while still fully preparing yourself to be a great birth partner.

1. Labor and Birth
   The basic Labor and Birth class covers the process of labor and birth.  You’ll learn how to recognize labor when it starts, all about the different stages of labor and what to expect, and probably hear about dilation and effacement.  There may be a birth video.  This class may also include a brief tour of the facility and an explanation of hospital policies.
2. Comfort Techniques for Labor
   The couple of hours you spend in this class will be some of the most valuable time you spend preparing to be an awesome birth partner.  It will cover different techniques for making labor more comfortable.  It may cover positions for labor and pushing, breathing techniques (but almost certainly not the “hchee hchee hchoooo” stuff), things you can do to reassure and encourage her or help make her comfortable, and possibly more.  Seriously, take this class.
3. Baby Basics
   If you have never taken care of a baby before, take this class.  You’ll learn about diapering, bathing, feeding, soothing, swaddling, and generally caring for a newborn.  In fact, even if you have taken care of a baby before, this might still be helpful in filling in gaps in your knowledge and learning the best ways to do things.  Taking this class will help ease your mind about what to do after the birth, and let you focus on being a birth partner.
4. Grandparents Class
   This one isn’t for you–it’s for the grandparents-to-be.  Remember hearing about when you were little?  You were birthed in the woods over a campfire, swaddled in asbestos, and soothed to sleep with a little bourbon mixed into your lead-lined baby bottle.  Well, maybe it wasn’t quite like that, but birthing and baby-care practices have changed a lot since the grandparents-to-be were new parents.  This class will bring them up to date on what you’re learning in your classes, and provide helpful hints for being the best grandparents they can.

There might be a little bit of overlap in material covered in some of these classes.  That’s okay.  Take special note of those items–anything covered in more than one class must be important.

Now, there are two major benefits to these classes beyond learning all kinds of really useful things.  First, you are demonstrating to the mother-to-be that you are committed to being the best birth partner you can.  That will be comforting to her throughout the birthing process.  Second, you are able to observe how she reacts to various things in the classes (which comfort techniques she likes, which stage of labor she looks worried about, her comments on various pain management options).  File those observations away–and maybe talk to her about them–because understanding her will be helpful to you in supporting her.

Now go sign up for classes!

Next up in the series:  Plan Ahead – Packing